Do You Argue With Yourself?

Do you find that periodically during the day you have debates with yourself? Are you constantly discussing matters with yourself in order to make appropriate decisions? Doesn’t it seem that if you didn’t have to spend this time arguing with yourself you could spend more quality time making money?

Let’s look at common conflicts that you may be experiencing and see which ones seem to hit home. Examples of both personal and professional internal conflicts include:

• Part of me wants to be good and serve God, yet part of me is mad at God be cause…
• Part of me wants to read this article and learn more, yet part of me feels that it won’t do any good, or I’m too busy.
• Part of me wants to be a business person, and part of me wants to be a stay-at-home mom/dad.
• Part of me likes my coworkers, and part of me does not.
• Part of me wants to exercise, but part of me wants to rest and eat.
• Part of me loves my spouse, but part of me wants to find a new partner.
• Part of me wants to get up early and get a lot done, but part of me wants to sleep in.
• Part of me wants to start my own company, but part of me wants to work for someone else and leave all the administrative stuff to them.
• Part of me wants to go to the networking meeting to get new clients, and part of me is afraid to present my product.

Many people walk around in conflict to some degree for most of their day. For example, let’s say that part of you wants to go to the movies with your kids and spend quality time with them. This part of you knows that they will grow up soon and you enjoy watching them have fun, but the other part of you wants to stay home and get your work projects done. The deadline is coming soon and if your kids were at a movie with someone else, you would have the time to concentrate and be productive. What should you do?

In any conflict you need to take these three steps:

1. Recognize the conflict and acknowledge it. Know what conflicts you are having and write them down.
2. Give attention to both sides looking at the intent underneath the desire. Ask yourself, “Where does this intent come from?”
3. What are you going to do about it? How can you compromise?

Once you acknowledge that both sides present a good outcome, you may realize that slick time management may solve the problem. Make the time to focus and get some work done, clear the two hours and then go enjoy the kids.

What kind of conflicts do you feel? What kinds of lectures do you give yourself? With a little practice and planning, most of the time you will find a way to fulfill both sides of your conflict, without having to give in to one side or the other.