The Fables You Write About Life And Business

For each experience in your life, both positive and negative, you create a meaning to the situation. That meaning is what we call a belief. A belief is something that you may perceive to be true but cannot be scientifically proven as true. Beliefs occur when we look at something from a one-sided, limited perspective. For example, if you look at a piece of paper straight on, it appears to be a white rectangle. Now you are quite certain that it is a white rectangle. You would stake your life on it and never change your mind. What if I look at the paper from the side and sees a long, white, thin line? I am looking at the same item and I am sure I’m seeing a line and not a rectangle. The two of us could debate forever about our differing viewpoints. Only when we are willing to look at the paper from a different angle or point of view do we see a new perspective. Both of us are right about our own out looks from our own specific perspectives. A belief is looking at something in only ONE WAY.

Beliefs that you have are really stories or fables you have written in your mind. They are not really true, they just seem true to you. You have written your story very convincingly and may perceive it to be true, but it is only true to you. If you want to be more in control of your thinking and internal limitations, the most important thing you can do is notice when you have a limiting belief. What limiting beliefs do you have?

Examples of Personal Limiting Beliefs:

• Math is hard for me.
• I will never be thin.
• I’ve never been good at details.
• I’m not a good ball player.
• I can’t do it.
• I’m not good enough.
• I am worthless.
• I’m not lovable.
• I am not a patient person.
• I can’t remember things very well.
• I am incapable of so many things.

Examples of Professional Liming Beliefs

• I can’t make money.
• I don’t know how to sell.
• I’ll never be good at business.
• I’m not lucky.
• I can’t manage my team.
• I am not able to make money.
• I don’t deserve money.
• I don’t know what to do next.
• I don’t have talent.
• I am not good at balancing my bank statements.

Make a list of your limiting beliefs. Look at your limiting beliefs and say: “I have written a fable that…” For example: “I have written a fable that I am unlovable.” Go down your entire list. Before each limiting belief say, “I have written a fable that…”

What happens if you put a question mark at the end of the liming beliefs statement? “I am unlovable?” “I don’t deserve success?” What answer do you give yourself to those questions?

Look at the belief from someone else’s perspective; someone that you respect. How would they feel? Put your belief on them and imagine how they would act. How do they handle the situation? How do they act differently? How would they think and feel about the same issue? If they feel differently about the same statement, then there must be more ways to look at it than from the stuck perspective you had.

Do these exercises shift your stories? Does your stuck belief begin to move a bit? Do you start to write a different ending to your fable? Notice small or large shifts in your thinking.

Look at your business in a new way. Thinking and believing differently can increase your revenue and decrease your costs. What possibilities does your business have that you hadn’t already acknowledged? How can you look at business in a way you hadn’t thought of before? Write new stories about your business and watch your profits soar.

The Incredible Button

Have you ever jumped to conclusions? Your boss asks you to do something and you immediately make it mean that they don’t respect you? Your coworker walks by with out saying “Hi” and, ever so quickly, you make it mean that they don’t like you or that you are not important. Wouldn’t it be interesting if you were able to pause a bit and not make it mean anything until you gave it some time? What if you didn’t grab a conclusion so quickly? Wouldn’t it be great to not let the good or bad opinions of others affect you in either a positive or negative way and be free of others thoughts?

I have something magical for you! It is a wireless, invisible remote control with incredible powers. Let me explain how it will assist you in keeping control over your thoughts and emotions.

Imagine now that you see a cool looking remote control sitting next to you on the chair. Go ahead and imagine you are picking it up. There are a lot of re ally cool buttons on this remote. The only one you need right now is the button. When any scenario occurs in your life where you begin to make a limiting belief or meaning, push the button and don’t ask “why.”

For example, you have a lunch appointment with a buyer and they are late. After about fifteen minutes of waiting you may begin to make a story as to why they are late. You may think that he:

• Doesn’t want your product.
• Doesn’t really like you.
• Doesn’t respect your time.
• Forgot the appointment because he is dumb.
• Got in an accident and is dead.
• Is late because he can’t find the restaurant.
• Planned for a different day and miscommunicated.

Which meaning should you use? How about none of them? Push your button and go into neutral mode. Make no meaning yet. Wait. Clear your mind. Be open for possibilities. When your associate finally shows up for lunch, then you can ask him what happened and know the real meaning of why he was late. You will realize that you didn’t need to waste your precious time writing false stories.

It is difficult for a person to make no meaning out of a situation such as this. It is very common to quickly attach a meaning to an event. I invite you to use your button often. When you do, go into the “Nothing.” The Nothing is a state of mind where there are no thoughts or beliefs. If your friend is late to lunch, stop right there in the Nothing and wait until you know why instead of moving into a negative meaning.

My clients report that they use their buttons often! The remote comes in so handy because its use is so quick and effective. When you begin to use your button often, you will start to realize that beliefs or meanings are very sub jective and not real.

When will you use your new button this week? When you have learned how to use it, I recommend that you share it with your friends and coworkers; they will surely appreciate the gift.

Do What Successful People Do

Are there tasks in your daily work that you love to do, like to do or simply dread doing? Many jobs include tasks you enjoy and some that you may not like or put off until later. Unfortunately, there are many times when “later” never arrives. Don’t worry; you are not alone.

The sad truth is that most people are not successful in business. One of the main reasons is that they stay far away from the “dreaded tasks.” These tasks don’t go away; they just pile up higher and higher!!

All people have talents in specific areas and tasks they prefer to do over the dreaded tasks. The problem is that a business needs all aspects of expertise and no one job is really more important than another. Is having the office organized as important as making a sale? Ultimately it is, as it “all comes out in the wash.” Each task supports the sale and the functionality of the business; each is profoundly important.

So how can we learn to do the tasks we keep putting off? An NLP principle is to model successful people. For example: if someone has or does something that you want to have or do, look at them and copy their attitude, behaviors, actions and thoughts.

Do successful people have dreaded tasks or are they so lucky that they enjoy every single aspect of their business? Of course they have dreaded tasks. Successful people simply do things they don’t want to because the task is important.

This week, take a look around and notice people you feel are successful. Ask them what tasks they do in their jobs that they don’t like. Most likely they will tell you their least favorite task and then tell you that they do it anyway because they know it needs to be done.

So, the jobs you don’t want to do, that are truly important… Just do them. Believe in the importance of the task and just do it. Break the task into achievable sizes and start at the beginning. Delegate it if you have to and spend your time being productive. Get the unlikable tasks done today.

Doing all tasks consistently will increase your revenue dramatically and lower your costs because you are efficient and consistent.

Are Your Beliefs Moving you to Action?

Is a belief real or not? Think about it. The definition of real is something that can be documented by science and is tangible and testable.

If I believe that the world is scary, am I right? I am to myself, but not to science. My neighbor may believe that the world is fun and full of opportunity. Is she right? To herself, yes, but it can’t be proven by science. With this information, we can conclude that beliefs are not real ! So if beliefs are not even real, then we must be able to change them . Let me explain.

Because our perceptions are not real, we are all walk ing around with our own reality in our own little private worlds with all our meanings and stories about ourselves, others, and beliefs about the world.

Even memories of our past are not real. If a football was in the middle of the room and someone moved it, it would no longer be here, would it? We may have a memory of the football, but it is not real at all now.

So if this is the case, why do past events still seem so real right now? Why do you feel rejected, sad or traumatized just by remembering an event? If it is not real, is in the past and is not present now, why does one feel the emotion years, decades, and possibly a half century later?

The answer is quite simple. Our experiences cause us to attach meanings and beliefs to the stimulus (a memory, thought, smell, sound or even a place). These feelings are coded in our physical bodies. When we come across a specific memory or other stimuli, those meanings, beliefs and feelings resurface.

Are any of these limiting beliefs familiar?

• I am not capable in business.
• I don’t deserve money.
• Money is hard to get.
• I am not good enough.
• I am not talented.
• Others abandon me.
• Other people are lucky in business.
• The world is out to get me.

Take a moment now to realize that these statements are beliefs . Although beliefs may feel, sound and look real, they are not real !

How much more successful will you be when you believe:

• There is a lot of money out there.
• I am capable of some things.
• I am good enough for the things I am good at.
• I am talented at some things.
• Others support me.
• I am lucky in business.
• The world supports all my dreams.

Look at your limiting beliefs from the perspective of a successful person that you honor and respect. What would they say about your limiting beliefs? How would they look at them differently? How can you begin to look at your limiting beliefs differently?

With positive beliefs you can increase your revenue and decrease costs. The cost of your new belief is only the price of your time to think differently, read a positive book or listen to an audio program to assist you. Wow!

It is exciting to know that you can have control over your thoughts.

Whistle While You Work

While we were young, we all learned from Snow White to whistle while we work while the Seven Dwarves set out merrily each day singing, “Hi ho, Hi ho, It’s off to work we go.” They put their hearts into their job no matter what their task.

So many people want to live their passion through their work. They want to spend their life’s effort on what they love. If you love people, it is hard to sit in a cubicle all day. If you love nature, it is hard to be stuck inside. If you love family, it is hard to be shipped overseas to fulfill your job description. You may find yourself going to work with no spring in your step and no tune to whistle.

We don’t always get what we want in life. Life doesn’t dish out situations that we would ask for. It is rare to spend your life’s work doing your passion.

Does this mean that we ought to be sad and unfulfilled? Should we change jobs each quarter to try to finally figure out what we want to do? Is there no purpose to life since we may not have landed in the career of our choice? What choices do we have if we have found ourselves a slave to an occupation that is not rewarding? The answers lie in the workings of the mind; the beliefs and meanings we make each day. They lie in our core values.

Core values are the values that you would never live without and may even risk your life to live the value of each day. If these values were stripped from you, you would almost die. These values may include: honesty, integrity, family, relationships, charity, kindness, progress, service, persistence, living for each moment, love and passion.

Core values cause us to live with purpose and passion. They cause us to feel alive and be who we really are. It is important to hold these core values with us at every moment of each day.

What if you could easily and effortlessly shift your thinking and remember your core values? See what happens when you do this exercise: Write down your top five core values on a piece of paper. Keep them near you when you work.

What happens when you go to work today and you take your five most important values with you? Maybe you wash carpets honestly as you make relationships. You close loans with integrity . You sell houses passionately and feel the reward of the service you provide to the happy family that bought the house. You answer phones all day with persistence and feel progress for a job well done.

Keeping to your core values will give you a positive attitude. Your positive attitude will increase your job satisfaction, performance, and – ultimately – your revenue. Singing and humming are virtually free; so whistle a happy tune and put the spring back into your step.

Do You Argue With Yourself?

Do you find that periodically during the day you have debates with yourself? Are you constantly discussing matters with yourself in order to make appropriate decisions? Doesn’t it seem that if you didn’t have to spend this time arguing with yourself you could spend more quality time making money?

Let’s look at common conflicts that you may be experiencing and see which ones seem to hit home. Examples of both personal and professional internal conflicts include:

• Part of me wants to be good and serve God, yet part of me is mad at God be cause…
• Part of me wants to read this article and learn more, yet part of me feels that it won’t do any good, or I’m too busy.
• Part of me wants to be a business person, and part of me wants to be a stay-at-home mom/dad.
• Part of me likes my coworkers, and part of me does not.
• Part of me wants to exercise, but part of me wants to rest and eat.
• Part of me loves my spouse, but part of me wants to find a new partner.
• Part of me wants to get up early and get a lot done, but part of me wants to sleep in.
• Part of me wants to start my own company, but part of me wants to work for someone else and leave all the administrative stuff to them.
• Part of me wants to go to the networking meeting to get new clients, and part of me is afraid to present my product.

Many people walk around in conflict to some degree for most of their day. For example, let’s say that part of you wants to go to the movies with your kids and spend quality time with them. This part of you knows that they will grow up soon and you enjoy watching them have fun, but the other part of you wants to stay home and get your work projects done. The deadline is coming soon and if your kids were at a movie with someone else, you would have the time to concentrate and be productive. What should you do?

In any conflict you need to take these three steps:

1. Recognize the conflict and acknowledge it. Know what conflicts you are having and write them down.
2. Give attention to both sides looking at the intent underneath the desire. Ask yourself, “Where does this intent come from?”
3. What are you going to do about it? How can you compromise?

Once you acknowledge that both sides present a good outcome, you may realize that slick time management may solve the problem. Make the time to focus and get some work done, clear the two hours and then go enjoy the kids.

What kind of conflicts do you feel? What kinds of lectures do you give yourself? With a little practice and planning, most of the time you will find a way to fulfill both sides of your conflict, without having to give in to one side or the other.

What you focus on, you give power to

The unconscious mind has an unlimited ability to hold information; it never sleeps, and it is always absorbing information and data. Your unconscious intends to protect you in any way that it can; it kept you from falling off the bed last night, didn’t it? It was aware of the edge of the bed and kept you away from it, just far enough to be safe.

The problem is that the unconscious mind (about 97 percent of the brain) is not very smart, at least in a logical way. For this reason, you need to engage the conscious mind so that you will act appropriately. The limitation is that the conscious mind can attend to only about five things at the same time, and everything else fades to the background. Now, five bits of information is certainly a lot less than millions of bits of information, so you must constantly decide what those five conscious things ought to be.

For example: If you look for all the green objects in the room, you will find them, and if you look for all the yellow, you will see all the yellow. If you sort for all the mean people in the world, you will find them; when you look for what is working in your life, you will see it. Focus on what you want. Go for what you want and keep your focus on what you have chosen!

How about your significant other or a good friend? Is there something about them that bugs you? Now be honest. Most people would say, “Yes, indeed.” Now take something that bugs you and visually move it to the background. Next, focus on something that you like and visually make it big and compelling, full of color and life. Let it slide into the foreground. Wow. How do you feel now?

If you choose to spend your mind capacity thinking and stewing about negative things, sure enough, you will feel negative. I do not presume that we live in denial; I offer the concept that we highlight what is working rather than what is not working–in other words, what you have rather than what you don’t have. It is interesting to note that depressed individuals focus on what they do not have. If you ask depressed people how they feel or what their thoughts are, they will tell you about things that are going wrong or things they do not have.

Do you have legs? Some people do not. Do you have food? Some people do not. Do you have a job? Some people do not. No matter what your circumstance, you have something to be thankful for.

Focus on what you have, what you want, what is good, and what can be changed, and move forward in your life.

Four Hats for Success!

In any business there must be four hats worn each day. Your company could consist of just you, the owner and operator, or it could consist of over 2,000 employees. By managing these four hats, you will increase revenue through efficiency and decrease costs by eliminating waste and disorganization.

1. The Captain (General Manager/Owner). The Captain oversees, delegates and organizes. Captains are individuals usually known as the General Manager. They see the broader picture and make sure the smaller jobs are done: bills are paid, files are organized, the accounts receivable are up to date, etc. They do not actually do the small task jobs, they make sure the jobs are fulfilled and the company runs smoothly. It is also necessary that they step back to notice and acknowledge the company’s short and long term goals.
2. Deck Support (Office Assistant). Deck Support makes sure the small details are done. This hat is usually worn by employees such as the office assistant, the runner and/or the logistics person. They complete small-detail tasks such as filing, data entry, paying bills and making sure the office is clean and organized. This person will report to the Captain.
3. The Technician (Worker). The Technician makes and installs the windows, installs the computers or cleans the carpets. The Technician gets the product to the consumer so that money can be collected.
4. The Dreamer (Entrepreneur). The Dreamer can’t sleep nights because they are imagining how great things will be. Dreamers are the visionaries of the company and dream about logos, expansion, fulfillment, money, power, fun and energy.

All of these jobs are very important. When a company loses its Captain, it runs into an iceberg and drowns. With no Deck Support, things get lost and the company crashes. Without a Technician, no product is delivered; thus no revenue. If a company loses its Dreamer the company’s vision is lost and the company experiences a slow death.

If hats are worn by employees other than the General Manager, the Captain needs to hold the employee accountable to staying on task and completing the job. The General Manager also needs to hold the Captain accountable to receive appropriate information and complete necessary tasks.

A ship cannot run without a crew. Although the hats and tasks are separate and different, it is imperative to hold a weekly staff meeting to stay on the same page. Nothing hurts a company faster than the right hand not knowing what the left hand is doing; having hats sprawled all over the place and getting lost. Staff meetings can be rewarding when they are consistent and will result in your company’s progress.

The human mind can get confused easily. The unconscious can only attend to about five tasks at once so juggling four hats is a skill that needs to be developed. Do this by separating the four hats in your mind. Realize and recognize which hat you are wearing and focus on the job that you are doing. Be clear in your mind what task you are completing and consciously switch your hat when needed.

The Captain needs to assess when each hat needs to be worn and when. Sometimes the Captain’s hat will take all day and the Dreamer’s hat is saved for the weekend. It may be that the Technician hat is not worn for a few weeks until a job needs to be completed. This expertise is valuable and becomes more thorough when the Captain steps back and looks at the whole company from a broader perspective.

Each hat is fulfilling and rewarding in its own way. Take satisfaction in tasks well done, keep your hats in order and enjoy smooth sailing!